Weekend Adventures: Great Eats & Sweet Moments

 

Finding quaint places to eat and new adventures have become our thing, and it's great to enjoy it with Kai and Titus as well. I am convinced that the best places to eat are sometimes the hardest to find! And being able to try new things always makes for new memories and great weekends.

This past Saturday we were invited to try The Secret Garden with a friend of ours. I've heard about it and the dining experience, but just never found the time to make it. The restaurant is located in Old Town Occoquan here in Woodbridge, VA. It's most certainly hidden, only providing a hanging sign to its entrance. 

 

But my oh my is it fantastic! The food was absolutely incredible and the service was outstanding. I tried the salmon burger (trying to eat healthier...most days) while the boys ate fresh blueberries with chicken and fries. Did I mention they have a children's menu and all of their ingredients are fresh?!? We all had such a wonderful time amongst the peaceful and semi quiet (my kids were quite entertaining) environment. 

 

 

Mike and I plan to go back again for brunch just the two of us. I've heard it's even better! What are some of your favorite quaint spots? 

Marriage: Learning this side of Us

 

The best marriage advice I received was early on: "relationships are like a dance, to grow you have to learn and adjust your steps." Every season is like a new song, sometimes you can move with ease or your partner can. Other moments you both seem to have left feet and desperately need some aid on the dance floor. Regardless of the song, when you've found someone you want to keep dancing with you figure it out along the way. 

For the last two years we've been in a season of a lot of new steps and many forgotten ones that I've had to relearn. As much as I love watching other couples, my biggest "couple goals" have always been my own...but it hasn't been easy. After coming alongside my husband in ministry, many areas that we had suppressed, ignored, and put a do not disturb sign on came full force in our faces. Going from seeing each other for maybe three hours total (working two different jobs and schedules) to now being side by side almost the full 24...it's been a serious adjustment! 

 

These last two years of our marriage have been unique as our love and commitment have required far more actions than words. When the arguments have gotten ugly and the space between us has felt like a thousand miles emotionally - my heart's intentions had to step up their game. Nothing is solved in a day, but as we learn, grow, and mend some broken areas I've noticed 3 changes we've made in this new dance:

1. Acknowledging where things are at: Because it's better to feel the sting of truth rather than the heartbreak of a lie. Though we can laugh now, we couldn't a few months ago when we both realized "this should be a safe place, but it's not." Processing that we both were on edge in the majority of our conversations always caused a sense of walking on eggshells. Truth was somewhere a hurt or offense began to crack our safe haven between us. Before we knew it everything was heard, seen, and felt through a distorted lense. Acknowledging and speaking truth to one another has rebuilt simple trust in our communication and safety...it's a daily practice I know we must stay committed to.

2. Make the time: It's the kids. It's your job. I'm tired...we all know the excuses, so we don't have to make the time. Saying yes to everything and everyone else made it so easy for me to say no to Mike and vice versa. Time is precious and the best way it's spent is cultivating your most important relationships. Understanding that all really good things take time...your time. Push yourself to make the effort if you want it to work. So making time to spend without kids, making time to find areas of interest, making time to have sex (indeed - that as well), all of those things are so vital for both of us. As we've made it a priority my radar can sense now when we haven't... which is a good thing. 

3. Identify and Practice ONE area of common ground: If Mike were writing this it would be sex haha. And truth is if that's your starting point in your marriage to help things get back in place, then by all means go for it! But in all seriousness for us it's prayer. Our own spiritual walks are what brought us together and it's our strongest common ground - our love for Jesus Christ. So we start there, and it doesn't always look like long devotionals or time spent on our knees praying. It's looked like conversations about podcasts, articles, a book we read together, or even what God may be sharing with us personally. Intentionally talking about something we both enjoy starts to open doors for us to talk about other things. Like the days when you could talk on the phone for hours...remember those? Yeah, I don't remember what we talked about at all, but I can recall the feeling of not wanting it to end. Practicing and finding something you both can do reminds you that you both actually like each other before this season. For us it's unveiled areas we didn't realize were a common ground! But practice is so key.

Though not everyone believes in soulmates, I do believe that when you choose to dance and take a journey alongside someone else you mean it. You choose that person, because it makes sense in more areas of your life than you can count. In our truthful moments we've both wanted to quit and walk off the dance floor...it's not been easy, but intentionally changing has become easier as we practice it. 

I pray whether it's your best season or worst while you step on each other's toes that you're encouraged and try at least one of these three for yourself. All good things are worth trying and I'm a firm believer that this is worth trying. 

Ministry & Marriage: Unexpected Connections

October has literally been filled with all things pumpkin! Everyday for the last several weeks Mike and I have been overseeing our annual youth fundraiser, which happens to be a Pumpkin Patch. It's actually been really cool (a bit overwhelming haha), but nonetheless a crazy whirlwind I know I wouldn't have survived without Mike. 

As we see the light at the end of the tunnel, I've been looking back at how even this opportunity allowed us to better communicate, find ways to enjoy one another, and see new strengths that we didn't know existed. I have to say my favorite part has been reading The Pumpkin Patch Parable to a crowd of children while Mike (dressed as Tigger) has acted out parts alongside me and kept them on edge as to how the story ends. 

It's been a sweet and stressful month, but more importantly incredible. Ministry has its moments, but I'm thankful we do it together...I really wouldn't have it any other way.

Weekend Adventures: Plus One, Fresh Produce, New Routines

Our first weekend as a family of four! Sure we added an additional hour to our prep time and I haven't done my hair for the last several days (but I did wash it!) - we still managed to get out and enjoy our weekend.

Definitely slowed down a bit which is my favorite part about being on maternity leave - well any vacation honestly. Things are so busy even when we don't want them to be, so I'm soaking up having Mike home (he will be headed out for two weeks with some major ministry trips) and adjusting to two little ones. It's a calming feeling not having to watch the clock right now, well aside from times to nurse (which Titus makes sure to remind me ha!)

Mike planned for us to visit the local farmer's market Sunday which I absolutely loved! Since Sunday is our "work" day in a sense, I often drive by the market wishing we could browse around...but this time we got to actually stop and see for ourselves! All of the delicious fruits and veggies, and fresh DOUGHNUTS (I wish we bought more), I could have browsed a lot longer. Talking to different farmers and just bringing some great things home was well worth the trip. If you have a local one I would totally visit it - not just price wise, but the freshness I could tell immediately from when we buy at the store. Next time I go I hope to have more of a game plan/shopping list so I can really maximize my visit.

The boys enjoyed their time and I got to test out my infant insert for the Ergo I bought for Kai. Titus slept like a little prince and Kai of course munched on kettle corn almost sabotaging lunch (yolo right?) 

A well needed nap for all of us and an evening grilling closed things up for my tribe - honestly does it get any better? I'm sure it does as I get to spend moments with my boys - sleep deprived, crazy, wonderful moments...

Motherhood: Titus Xavier's Birth Story

"It's a false alarm. Your contractions are decreasing, I can tell in your face you're not happy, but maybe you're dehydrated a little - I'm so sorry." Nothing but a flashback of sitting in Labor and Delivery for Kai as the midwife told me the same, with much less grace and a disclaimer that this was what "first time moms do."

That was Monday... I cried. If looks could kill I murdered that sweet doctor multiple times and even more when she mentioned I should push up my c-section date. I wanted so badly to be affirmed that I had an ounce of understanding that I was in labor (seriously I was on contraction watch the ENTIRE 38th & 39th week!) I didn't want this to end up like my first pregnancy when the nurse asked me why my fluids had not been checked sooner and I could've avoided a c-section.

Please do not misunderstand I have no qualms with c-sections and my recovery was nothing like many of the stories I've heard, but to know it wasn't medically necessary was something that never settled with me...I knew my body. 

Leaving the hospital I held Mike's hand and I cried/ threw a tantrum that this all was a waste of time. "This is not like the first pregnancy, and you've got to stop reliving it." He was right - because up until that point the last two weeks I couldn't focus on anything else, but having a VBAC. It somehow would justify things - make it right...but that wasn't completely true. Makai's birth story made me a mother - how incredible was that and is?!? How he arrived did not take away that fact in the slightest. So I let it rest (as much as my anxious heart could), and after Monday I knew I needed to stop obsessing and let it be.

Tuesday - After the false alarm and everything checked out well I was asked to come into the office to see if I had progressed and to just follow-up. My mom went with me, because moms are just amazing like that. The doctor did her routine exam and unexpectedly stripped my membranes, pretty sure each time I've done this I still clench at the thought... After a few laughs and a side eye for catching me off guard, the doctor simply said "I'm very hopeful this weekend he will come. You're a great candidate still." (And a note to keep walking...and have more sex) Of course as we left my mom cheered we were 2cm and effacing (thanks mom). I took a sigh of relief...it would work out how it should. With that sigh brought on contractions - like the ones veteran moms tell you about...for the next four days. 

Saturday (due date) - I figured I needed to keep myself occupied at this point. Mike left for a meeting early morning so Kai and I took a spin at grocery shopping. Grocery shopping and contractions don't really mix... I received several "you're ready to pop," "you're huge," "wow!" - all of the usual pregnant women greetings while checking items off our list. We made it home and I was exhausted. Around 6pm I started noticing a pattern with the contractions, but didn't time them (out of fear honestly)...but by 7:30pm, they weren't stopping. So we waited until 9:00pm and I called to see if I needed to go to the hospital. Yes. 

Dropped off Kai and made our way down not sure what to expect, but the contractions kept coming.

Around 10:30pm we were admitted and I was at 3cm 80% effaced. Contractions were consistent and the doctor discussed a plan, explaining I needed an epidural just in case a c-section was needed (I felt at peace). We were in, it was really happening, if anything this was it!!

I will spare you the next several hours, because they consisted of me pretty sure I was ready to rip out my insides, tears, trying to not punch someone - great labor things. Strangely my epidural didn't work and only numbed the top half of my left thigh haha, so this was incredibly natural ironically... but after my water broke I went from 4cm to 6cm and then I started yelling that I needed to push. Luckily I was right 9.5cm and got the green light within seconds. 

Our Nurse Dana!

My mom was the big coach and kept me from all of my "I cant's." Mike was exactly what I needed with a side of humor only he can get away with, holding my hand calmly reminding me I was doing great (and I think at one point when the head was crowing he was going to pass out haha). And lastly was our phenomenal nurse Dana who was our biggest advocate despite the doctor at one pointing
stating we needed a c-section. No words can ever thank her.

Sunday at 1:48pm Titus Xavier Galeano burst (literally) into the world. 8lbs 19.5" with a mane that you could make a toupee out of! I cried, I yelled "it's a baby!!" when he came out (everyone burst into laughter) not sure what I was expecting, but I couldn't believe it happened. He was here, it was a VBAC, I had the best support team (thanks to my close friends and especially my sister who responded to EVERY text, call, pigeon carrier about my labor process), and medical advocate through it all - no cliche it was a blessing and a wonderful lesson.

Their stories are so different and I'm so grateful to be a mother of two stunning little boys. I will say Titus' birth has brought Mike and I closer and me much more vulnerable about my own faith, handling the unknown, and trusting God with my hopes and dreams more than before (because it's not easy no matter how long you've served Him). 

I'm excited to enjoy our growing family and I can't say enough how awesome it is when you have others believing in your dream with you.

Welcome sweet Titus Xavier. 

Motherhood: Maternity Photos

Though I have been silent, I have kept several posts that I just have not pressed the "publish" button on. I will be doing this very soon as I know that this season has been a very significant one for me especially as a wife and mother...even more so as a woman. I didn't completely disappear friend, just a little silent as I've done some much needed reflection.

Recently we took some maternity photos, this we did not do with Kai. My dear friend and phenomenal photographer had been asking us for well over a year to take new family photos and the occasion finally rose with little guy coming! To say I'm in love would be an understatement! I seriously cannot get enough of how they turned out. I'm looking forward to printing these and hanging them in the nursery. Did I even mention that it's finally done?? That's a post for the weekend I think - I'm beyond elated with how that turned out as well. Okay enough, let's get to the maternity shoot!

Thank you as always Uplifted Photography for being family and dear friends - and always having an amazing vision when you capture us! We truly can't wait to meet the new little one and I cannot wait to share him with you all too! Hope you're ready to enjoy the weekend just as much as I am!

Weekend Adventures: Easter, Family, and Rest

 

As the weekend comes to a close I have to say that despite it feeling incredibly busy, I loved that we all had time together. I found myself managing our schedule much better by leaving earlier and allowing Kai and myself to rest at a decent time since Mike was apart of this year's Easter production. Though Thursday and Friday were late evenings for him, Kai and I were asleep and ready to tackle the next day! The further along I get in my pregnancy the more I realize that I need rest - so I'm grateful that we can be flexible (thanks babe).

Saturday we helped and enjoyed the Easter carnival which was full of cotton candy, candy, and of course an egg hunt. We overstuffed ourselves with cotton candy and I'm not ashamed to say it! This was Kai's first real indulgence in this sweet nectar (can you tell my love for cotton candy?). I would say the sticky hands, face, and request for more made this experience for him a success! Later in the evening I took a "mommy break" and went to Target so I could pick up some items for dinner and see what I could find for Kai's basket (you can read about last year's basket here). While I was standing in the $1 section, I found myself thinking outloud and mentioning that I wasn't sure if Kai really needed a basket this year. A fellow mom beside me told me I didn't want him to "not know" about the holiday and I should get a few small things. As I roamed around I couldn't help but run that through my head a few times (you know me well... Miss Analytical), and I came to the conclusion that I want Kai to know what Easter is about...and it has nothing to do with a basket.

So I scratched the basket this year...and I didn't feel bad about it. Instead I bought Kai and Mike a few items I knew they would enjoy/need and called it a day. Kai got a bubble wand and some cool Ninja Turtle snack keepers - oh and not to mention underwear! I could not get one single photo that wasn't blurry, because Kai LOVED the bubble wand (point for me!). Mike and Kai played with the bubbles well into dinner time and I am glad I didn't go above and beyond this year. However, we did read the Easter story and thanked God for sending His son in the most gracious and selfless acts ever committed. I think that will be a part of our family tradition...

Finally Sunday rolled around and we rested. I crafted while the boys took naps and we spent time with friends who are family. Mike had requested for us to take a picture together at the same spot over 2 years ago when we were pregnant with Kai (oh time...). My how we've grown.

How was your weekend? Were you able to enjoy today off as well? I worked a small portion of today, but had some great time with my sister and nephews at the house. We even cleaned up the front yard and put down new mulch! I know you're beaming with excitement as well haha! I could get used to more days like today and this weekend.

Weekend Adventures: Mike is 30!

This weekend was not long enough in many ways since we spent the majority of it traveling to and from Georgia. Despite our exhaustion we were able to enjoy the time back home with Kai (I missed him terribly) and celebrate Mike's 30th birthday!

Parties can be overwhelming and the last thing I wanted to do was not actually enjoy the party with him due to planning and wanting it to be "perfect." As much as I love a great Pinterest party or blog worthy one, I know that sometimes picture worthy doesn't always end up equate to the value of time well spent for the person it's for. So this year I stuck to what I know Mike loves...quality time with close friends and family + great home cooked food. A simple BBQ and of course rice and beans (that's a staple in our house) along with his favorite cupcakes from Sweet Little Morsels = Mike's perfect celebration. Full of laughter and lots of dancing, we had such a great time.

I pray this year continues to be just as full of quality moments for him and for us. I love you babe! Happy 30th!

Weekend Adventures: Virginia State Fair

On a whim we were asked by some friends to head to the state fair on Sunday. If you know me well, then you know that I am very much a hermit crab and will likely say no if given options in advance in regards to hanging out...don't get me wrong I love spending time with friends, I just can easily talk myself out of it (a terrible habit I know). I'm extremely happy we went! I've lived in Virginia for over 20 years (I'm 28) and I've never been to the fair - honestly I've never even known there was a state fair!

We ate lots of greasy and fattening foods which definitely made it even more worth the trip. Kai rode his first merry-go-round and his first roller coaster which he made by a hair literally when he was measured! The new experiences and my steak pita (mashed potatoes, steak tips, sauteed onions and mushrooms on pita bread) I would do it all over again...and again just for the pita.

I'm so grateful for friends who remind me to get out and enjoy trying something new. As much as I love my normal routine, I know that for my sanity and for Kai to really have awesome experiences I have to stretch myself even when I least want to. I recently read Elizabeth Ivie's post on intentional friend making and she even touched on navigating the whole paradigm of internet friendships. Shortly after I soaked in that post (it's a great read) - I spent a few minutes talking with a long time friend (more or less a little lecture) on needing to get out more and actually enjoy the friendships I've made. Life can get so busy I (especially all moms) easily neglect what we most need in general as women and that is genuine friendships. So thank you dear friend, I needed that push to not just sit behind a screen or interact at work, but enjoy the time spent with valued friends.

As always here are a few of my favorite pictures from the weekend (my camera died right before we got into the fair...but it probably was best to enjoy it all first hand)!

I hope you enjoyed your weekend and are ready for the week. I'm excited to share the crafts I've been working on and an update on my time with the She Reads Truth devotionals! Also I love this picture of Mike, I don't always catch him in a candid...but when I do it's something else.

Weekend Adventures: We're Two!

This weekend was extra special since we got to celebrate the big #2!! I can't believe how fast time is flying by and I'm not sure if I want it to continue at this pace (slow.down.please). However, this was by far my favorite out of the two parties this year. We were able to celebrate in our new home and we had a bounce house! Thanks to Mike (he truly saved the party this year) we ended up renting one out while I had a series of meltdowns since I was so far behind on planning.

Though I had a Pinterest board for this event and I had talked about it; I just wasn't ready or prepared as much as I had hoped to be. I scrambled for a theme since Kai is into several different things. Would it be cars? dancing? wrestling? I just couldn't decide until as of recently he has fallen in love with matchbox cars - AHA! So with a simple car theme we made this party happen from start to finish. It was a great combination of house welcoming and birthday party all at once. Our dearest of friends came and I realized just how grateful and blessed we are to be surrounded by authentic friendship. I even stepped out a little in style since I've been developing my eye for thrifted goods!

With lots of bouncing, laughter, and heartfelt embraces we celebrated the sweetest gift I've ever been given.

photography courtesy of Uplifted Photography