This past week I worked one day. Not because I was being lazy or I finally had the guts to dive into what I love - but because my body shut down. My invincible spirit met its match with a dose of bronchitis and a trip to the ER shortly after. Even when I say I'm resting I'm usually catching up on those things that I just can't seem to get done during the week (I know you understand) - so hitting this wall was incredibly hard for me. I found myself laying in bed unable to talk, on meds, and feeling worthless with my lack of works...
There are tons of encouraging posts for women and even moms to REST. REST. REST. It usually is accompained with deep thoughts and an example of how something unexpected knocked that person off of their feet. It's not a surprise that we all want to be superwoman. The desire and joy that comes with knowing you are needed can never be explained - because it's in our make-up.
It doesn't matter if I've worked a full 8-9 hours and sat in traffic, I still love coming home and cooking dinner, doing bath time, and throwing in some laundry. I look at people like my mother or dear friends who keep their wheels turning even when they have nothing left to give. Isn't that what women do? In short yes! I proudly wave the banner and say I love that part of me. I love giving it my all and seeing those I love the most benefit from it... but I'm terrible at balancing it and rarely like to be seen as tired and exhausted though I frequently am.
Last Thursday after being home with bronchitis I woke up with a sharp pain on my l ower left side. I brushed it off feeling guilty that I had been home two whole days and had a ton of work to get done in the office. I got myself together and we finished our normal routine (not saying anything to Mike about my pain). On my drive in the pain became so intense I began to cry and I knew something was wrong. I made it in and thankfully I was able to briefly tell my supervisor I had to go home. I called Mike in tears because I was afraid and most of all unsure of why I had such an intense pain. He told me to wait for him to drive me to the doctor, but I refused. I could drive myself home despite the pain (don't ask, we all make mistakes).
In short Mike ended up driving me to his office and shortly after the ER since my OB had not called back to see me. After several tests and feeling terrible I had taken Mike away from his day, I was told I had a ruptured ovarian cyst on my left side. So there went the rest of the week.
In all of this I realized something, because there surely had to be a lesson why my ovaries would act in such a way haha! Mike was phenomenal and completely at ease through it all. He had to continue to repeat and remind me to let him take care of me... He held my had through all of my tests and continued to keep me laughing as much and as little as possible. Though the saying is behind every great man is a strong woman - I found my greatest strength infront of me and almost missed it... out of pride.
I was a mess last week and still am recovering slowly as this week begins. As often as I love to be the center of the need for those I love most, I was reminded that those around me also desire the same from me...to be needed and to help me along the way. That's the beauty of sincere and genuine relationships and I'm so grateful that I can rest in great hands when it's my time to.
So yes, I couldn't end this without saying rest superwoman rest...you can save the day later...
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